The “What If” Edition
By Jason Blenkarn
What if this trip was thought of in stages of “what if?”?
What if the bike van was able to be unlocked when the key was deadlocked inside half way to Seascale?
What if I had had 5 pints of beer instead of 4 the night before?
What if we’d all had more than 3 hours sleep?
What if I’d had porridge instead of that bacon roll for breakfast?
What if I’d actually started the same time as everyone else?
What if I’d taken the KOM on Fobbles?
What if I had remembered to set the auto-pause on my Garmin?
What if I’d known when Hardknott Pass finished and waited for the others instead of carrying on to the Windermere Ferry?
What if Ross had his split time recorded at the ferry to get his bonus time taken off?
What if I’d managed to have a quick Tom Domoulin before the ferry crossing instead of waiting till Whitby?
What if I’d had just 5 ham baguettes at Kendal instead of 6?
What if we had a nutrition plan other than eat everything you can as often as possible?
What if Ross’ heartrate didn’t drop between the first 2 feed stations?
What if I hadn’t forced Ross to eat a banana?
What if the all the feed stations hadn’t cut all the bananas in half?
What if the second feed station wasn’t so busy?
What if I hadn’t ramped up the pace to the third feed station?
What if I’d continued to eat 6 baguettes at each feed stop instead of 2?
What if Ross hadn’t eaten fistfuls of everything?
What if Kev didn’t start singing?
What if Gary hadn’t taken 2 successive turns on the front of the group?
What if Gary didn’t get covered in lube?
What if the fourth feed stop didn’t have lemon squash?
What if Kev didn’t give me extra squash?
What if I didn’t eat 20 millionaire shortbreads at the fourth feed stop?
What if Ross hadn’t stolen the uncut bananas?
What if Ross hadn’t started to pull away towards the end?
What if I hadn’t double-bluffed on the antepenultimate climb and sprinted 5 yards to distance Ross?
What if Gary had told us about Limber Hill?
What if I hadn’t been able to keep the margin till the end?
What if I hadn’t been caught in traffic?
What if I hadn’t almost been run over 400 metres from the finish?
What if we hadn’t been talked into starting it all in the first place?
What if this was just one of the best experiences with great friends?